What It’s Like to Need Mental Health Counselling at 10 Years Old

At age 10, I needed mental health counselling. That sentence alone might surprise some people, but it’s the truth. It’s not something people often talk about—especially when the person needing help is a child. Yet looking back, it was one of the most important turning points in my life.

I was a quiet, sensitive girl who often felt like an outsider. My mind was constantly racing with worry. I had trouble making friends. I didn’t understand why I felt so different from the kids around me. Most adults assumed I was just shy or “a little anxious,” but what I was experiencing went far beyond that.

Feeling Misunderstood

From a young age, I felt like no one really saw me. Not in the way that counts. Teachers called me “smart but distracted.” Other kids thought I was weird or too quiet. Even when I tried to talk about what I was feeling, I didn’t have the language to explain it. I wasn’t acting out. I wasn’t loud. So, to the outside world, I didn’t look like someone who was struggling.

The truth is, I was overwhelmed. My emotions didn’t feel manageable. Simple things like going to school or talking to a new person gave me intense anxiety. I worried constantly—about getting in trouble, about doing everything perfectly, about whether anyone actually liked me. These weren’t just occasional nerves. This was a daily, draining cycle.

The Challenges of Being 10 and Female

At 10, you’re at an awkward stage. You’re not a little kid, but you’re not a teenager either. For girls, this time can be especially confusing. Your body is changing. Your relationships are starting to shift. You become more aware of how others perceive you. Social dynamics start to matter more—and they become harder to navigate.

Girls are often expected to be well-behaved, emotionally balanced, and socially skilled. If you’re not any of those things, you’re seen as a problem. But instead of being helped, you’re often left to figure it out alone.

I didn’t fit the mold. I wasn’t bubbly or outgoing. I didn’t always know how to respond to teasing or group dynamics. I took things personally. I cried easily. I got labeled as “too sensitive.”

Anxiety and Worry That Never Shut Off

Anxiety, for me, felt like a constant buzzing in my head. I overanalyzed everything I said. I replayed conversations in my mind. I dreaded social events and worried about my performance in class. I was afraid of failure but also afraid of attention. It was exhausting.

At night, my mind wouldn’t stop. I would lie awake for hours, running through worst-case scenarios. I thought something bad might happen to my parents. I worried about getting sick. I worried about being left out or embarrassed the next day. Even though I was doing well in school, I felt like I was barely holding it together.

Getting Counseling: The Turning Point

Eventually, my parents noticed how much I was struggling. They didn’t fully understand what was going on, but they saw the signs: frequent stomachaches, constant worrying, isolation. After talking to a school counselor, they decided to get me professional help.

That first counseling session changed my life. For the first time, I had someone who listened without judgment. My counselor didn’t dismiss my feelings. She didn’t tell me to just “toughen up” or “stop worrying.”

Instead, she helped me name what I was feeling: anxiety, fear of rejection, low self-esteem. She explained that my brain was doing something called “catastrophizing” — expecting the worst in every situation. And she taught me tools to slow down those spirals.

Counseling gave me permission to feel what I was feeling, while also giving me skills to manage it. It was the first time I felt seen.

Why Early Mental Health Support Matters

Looking back, I’m incredibly grateful I got help when I did. Mental health challenges don’t magically go away with age. If anything, they often get worse when they’re ignored. Kids like me, who struggle in silence, are at higher risk for depression, substance abuse, and other long-term issues.

Early intervention makes a difference. It taught me that emotions aren’t the enemy—they’re signals. And when we learn how to interpret those signals, we gain power over how we respond.

Mental health counseling at 10 helped me:

• Understand that I wasn’t broken.
• Learn coping strategies for anxiety.
• Build confidence in my social skills.
• Realize that it’s okay to ask for help.

Redefining What Struggle Looks Like

Part of the problem is that people still have a narrow view of what mental health issues look like. If a child isn’t acting out or failing in school, their suffering often goes unnoticed. But quiet kids struggle too. Sensitive kids struggle. Perfectionist kids struggle.

We need to pay closer attention to the children who hide their pain behind good grades or polite behavior. Just because a child looks fine on the outside doesn’t mean they aren’t hurting inside.

How to Support a Child Who Might Be Struggling

If you suspect a child in your life is dealing with anxiety or mental health challenges, here are some things you can do:

1. Listen without trying to fix: Sometimes, just being heard makes all the difference.
2. Validate their emotions: Say things like, “It makes sense that you feel that way.”
3. Watch for subtle signs: Withdrawal, perfectionism, physical complaints, or changes in mood can all be indicators.
4. Normalize therapy: Let kids know that asking for help is strong, not weak.
5. Create safe spaces: Kids open up when they don’t fear punishment or dismissal.

Final Thoughts

When I was 10, I needed counseling for my mental health. I needed someone to tell me that I wasn’t alone, that my feelings were real, and that it was okay to not have everything figured out. I’m glad I got that help. It didn’t fix everything overnight, but it gave me tools that I still use today.

Mental health doesn’t have an age requirement. Kids struggle, too. And they deserve to be supported, understood, and taken seriously.

If there’s one thing I hope parents, teachers, and caregivers take away from my story, it’s this: Don’t wait until a child is “in crisis.” Listen early. Believe them. And don’t be afraid to reach out for help.

Because sometimes, the quietest kids are carrying the loudest battles inside.

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